Small Penis Rule

The following excercise is going to be a bit difficult for women. Nonetheless give it a go.

Imagine someone has been libeling you.

They have describe you, in a work of fiction, to a T. They harshly describe your mannerisms, your appearance, the lot. They even give their character a name not a million miles from your own. Their scrutiny is exact and mocking.

So, finding this insupportable you decide to take real-world legal action. You open proceedings. The case goes to court. You are going to be rich!

There is only one problem. To win the case you must prove the author has described someone who cannot be anyone other than your good self. However, knowing this the prescient author has put a sex-scene into their book. The descriptions are detailed and steamy, from the carnal lust to the explosion of bodily fluids, from the build-up and titillation to the slippery gymnastics, from the throbbing bulges to the tiny penis. What? That’s right, a tiny penis.

Real World Example

Michael Crowley thought he was onto a winner when he sued Michael Crichton. He had been harsh on Crichton’s State of Fear in his job as a book reviewer. Crichton repaid the favour with a child-raping character called Mick Crowley in Next. That’s one real tender, adult and sensitive writer there.

Mick Crowley was not prodigiously penile.

Bibliography
The Small Penis Rule
The first description of the rule

This article was posted by Ronan McDonnell on Wednesday, July 6th, 2011 at 15:22.
It is archived in Short Post and tagged crichton, crowley, penis, rude, writing.

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